Rainy Days and Mondays...

I am feeling discombobulated. Something is not right in the universe.

My weird headaches and dizzy spells have returned. They are very mild but noticeable. I wonder what it means. I feel very disconnected from everything and everyone.

My roommate’s father passed away yesterday. For anyone who has lost a parent, you know these types of experiences always rehash old feelings and it is as if your memories become the present all over again. There is never anything to say and nothing you can do and even the effort of trying to think positive thoughts becomes too much.

Surely I don’t have cold weather blues already, do I?

Today is one of those days where melancholy thoughts soak me like cheap perfume. I am stuck and can’t see where to go even if I wasn’t stuck. I heard someone say the other day that it is important not to get “lost in the forest.” It really struck a chord in me, even though the nature of the advice is hokey. I feel lost in the forest, a lot. I have no compass. Sometimes, I think I will just waste away the rest of my life doing and saying the same things I do and say and my life would have meant nothing.

Oooof. That was a tad dark. Like I said, one of those days. I am sure by tomorrow I will be all smiles and going on and on about the social relevance of Suzanne Sugarbaker.